DEAR DEIDRE: DO I tell my parents that my brother is stealing from them? I am at the end of my tether with him.
My parents are in their 80s and don’t have much money. My brother is 42 and lives at home with them. I’m his 46-year-old elder brother. My brother swears he hasn’t done anything wrong but Dad lets my brother have access to his account to pay bills.
Dad’s latest bank statement made it clear that my brother takes out more money than is needed for the bills and is helping himself to more too – Dad has his PIN number written on a piece of paper.
My parents give my brother money all the time even though I tell them not to, and I know he has taken out credit card loans despite having no job.
My brother tells me to mind my own business and threatens to hit me when I accuse him of stealing.
DEIDRE SAYS: I understand how protective you feel of your parents but they still have the right to choose how they spend their money, even if you think it is ill-advised.
But it’s totally different if your brother is stealing from them. Point out to your parents that they are doing your brother no favours by enabling him to sponge off and steal from them.
Look into a lasting Power of Attorney so you can protect them. Citizens Advice can advise you (citizensadvice.org.uk).
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