DEAR DEIDRE: I’M finding it difficult to deal with my confrontational friend. She criticises nearly everything I say and do.
I have only known her for a few years but she has always been the same. If anything, I would say she is getting worse.
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We spent a day together last week but everything I said she did her best to undermine.
I hate confrontation, so I tend to keep quiet – even though I know most of the things she says are not right. I felt so down by the time I got home.
I don’t know whether I want to carry on with this friendship.
I’m a woman of 46, while my friend is 48.
DEIDRE SAYS: Your friend’s put-downs have nothing to do with you and are much more to do with how she feels about herself. By continuing the friendship, you not only allow her to hurt you, you also hurt yourself.
My support pack Standing Up For Yourself will help you communicate to her how all this criticism really makes you feel.
See if you can salvage the relationship by clearing the air. That would be much better than suffering in silence. But if the put-downs continue, tell her this is not working for you.
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