I think my boyfriend has autism, should I walk away?

DEAR DEIDRE: THE more I get to know my boyfriend, the more I think he has Asperger’s or autism and I just can’t cope any longer.

I met him online. He’s a good-looking 46-year-old who runs a small garage. He’s never been married. I’m 43 and separated.

His house was an absolute tip when I moved in. It’s taken me months to clear it up.

He has meltdowns when something doesn’t go as planned. He forgets loads of practical day-to-day things but will remember somebody’s telephone number from the Eighties.

I’ve tried to persuade him to have a test for autism but he’s refused. He’ll never change. Should I leave?

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DEIDRE SAYS:  Asperger’s is on the autism spectrum but your boyfriend must have positive qualities which attracted you in the first place.

Before walking away, read The Other Half of Asperger Syndrome by Maxine Aston, a guide to living in a relationship with an Asperger partner.

Get support through the National Autistic Society (autism.org.uk, 0808 800 4104). If you do stay, tell him that a diagnosis is nothing to be scared of and could help you both enjoy life more.

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